Well I am officially 24. I feel 24. Whatever that means. I've been talking to a guy for a couple of days. not the typical "Hey" "Hey" "Whatcha doin" "Nothing" text, but real conversations about life and expectations. The more we talked the more I realized that our understandings/expectations from the world are pretty similar. I then began to do what I do best, analyze. Over analyze. Reanalyze and pick. As usual it took little to no time to figure out what his thing was. He's me. He is precisely what I am. Confident, put together, driven, well mannered, easy to be around, blunt and hard to read. As I sat across from him I analyzed his every move. The way he ate. The way he held his silverware. How he reacted when I said controversial things...nothing. Not even phased. He smiled. Laughed a little, but not the response you would expect. His jokes were dry. Not like Steve Martin, but with a straight delivery that made you question whether it was a joke at all. He nodded as I told stories and I could see that in his head he had a dialog all his own going. He was mapping our future together. What would Sundays look like? Would I be a good cheerleader? Could he see me hanging out with his sister? Then I heard him move into phase two (of course in a way only one crazy can her another crazy speak) He started to share information. The things I would call selling points. He sold me on he ability to be competitive at his career. He sold me on his stability. He shared with me things he sees that he likes and things he sees that he doesn't. He began to tell me how he cares for people (ironically he's a small gift person, the most difficult kind of person for me to understand)I listened as he talked and what had began as a reserved dinner, with a guy I was indifferent about became a casual meal with someone easy to talk to to. The question then became. What exactly have I been looking for. As I first left our date and walked to my car I thought to myself. No fireworks. No spark. No tingly sensation in the pit of my stomach. Then I started to think about it. How many times has that feeling led to anything, but trouble...in case you're keeping track the count is up to 0 ( I really wish you could capitalize numbers!) I started to think about what mom says, about life being a slow burn. Not everything is a flash fire. Some things start out with a speck of curiosity and bloom from there.
As I drove home I mulled around his response to me and thought to myself about where I would rank this date. (Using a scale of 1-10, because despite what my male friends say 20 points is hard to work with...however in this case we're looking at a 9+8, which gives us 17, which means we're good to go.) I think I'm going to pump the breaks on writing this fellow off. Maybe I'll give him a chance to infuriate me...sounds like I'm turning over a new leaf already!
